My books are finally available on Amazon!!
Here’s the link to my Amazon author page where you can find all three in paperback and Kindle!
Trying to figure out how to navigate everything is a little tricky, I’m finding out. Goodreads has been an adventure this morning, since Convicted: 25 to Life is apparently listed under two different author profiles. Don’t know how that one happened.
I also found out the other day that the original version of the Holiday Spirit got a five-star review from someone I didn’t know! It’s an interesting feeling. People have been so nice to spread the word about my books coming out. It’s helped me see that I’m not alone. I’m doing book signing events on August 8th and 10th and my mother-in-law has been apparently telling everyone and their dogs about it. Hahaha! It’s weird for me. I’m used to feeling like people kind of see my dream of being an author as kind of like a pat-my-head, “that’s nice, dear,” kind of attitude. Now that it’s actually happening, I’m happy with the response I’ve gotten. Friends and family have been ordering them and sharing my Facebook posts about them like no one’s business! I’m really excited to see where this goes!
On the subject of supporting people, I’ve been having a lot of thoughts lately about what’s the best way to do that. I’ve seen instances where believing in someone so much can turn into an evil of sorts. My husband, Ryan, and I watched Kung Fu Panda last night and it got me thinking about it. And with our first baby on the way, I’ve been contemplating what parenting style I’m going to adopt.
A conclusion I’ve come to as far as positive reinforcement goes is that it’s a common misconception. I’m a HUGE supporter of the idea if done right. I worked at a daycare facility for a while that trained us how to discipline a child in a way that’s healthy for everyone. It’s hard to do, but a lot of times, I’ve discovered it’s totally worth it.
I read an article the other day written by an elementary school teacher who was basically destroyed by this parent for keeping their child in during recess because he wasn’t listening or something like that. I feel like I understand both sides of the argument. On the one hand, the parent thought, “that’s not fair! My kid shouldn’t have been held back from playtime!” (They didn’t understand the situation.)
On the other hand, the teacher was there and knew how the child was behaving. If he had used what this parent defined as positive reinforcement, or in other words, letting the kid do whatever he wanted, that kid wouldn’t have learned about consequences.
This goes for adults as well as children. If you’re constantly tearing someone down and telling them everything they’re doing wrong, that person isn’t going to know how to fix the situation and will then continue doing what’s wrong with no hope of ever pleasing you. But if you point out what they’re doing right, even if it’s a tiny thing, it goes a long way. The second you see that someone is doing something you like, tell them! There’s no harm in it and it’ll likely build up the person’s confidence in you and you in them. They’re far more likely to do what you want them to if they feel they’re doing something right than if you are constantly telling them what they’re doing wrong.
Think about it.
If you’ve worked on something for hours and you’ve poured your heart and soul into that thing and all people say about it is, “Not good enough,” how does that feel?
But if you get the one person who tells you that they believe in you, even if you’re not perfect (or just like them) you’re gonna want to be around that person more and more.
People are far more likely to do what you want them to (or at least like you more) if you use positive reinforcement this way. Point out good stuff you see in people when you see it, no matter how tiny it might be. Point out bad stuff when it’s appropriate and set boundaries. That’s what positive reinforcement is. Not just letting someone treat you like crap then saying, “Oh, they’re just like that.”